better hopeless than hope

my dear bloggsy why hoping is always end up with hopeless why ? i better not hoping because everytim ei hope for something it's almost never come true whhhhyyy? am i not diserve to that thing or what?? i'm tired really really tired oh damnnnn what's wrong with this i'm boriiiiing really really boring i need some relax relaaaaaaaaaaax my heart is weak i can't hold this anymore pretend to be quiet everthing just fine well i'm not fine i'm not okay i've been waiting and waiiiiting and waiiiiting but WHAT THE HELL I GET? HOPELESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS that's not okay that's sucks ugh i hate it somemuuuuch i'm not a complaining person but i really this disagree with this damn thing okay that's enogh it's just makes me get headache forget it all but it's not esay to forget oh my dear GOD help forget this thing make it likes it never happend before....